My Son Inspired My New Children’s Book

Posted on Sep 5, 2016 in Gender and Sexual Orientation, Lessons from the Field | 0 comments

Published on Huffington Post 09/05/16 Being a mother has called me to do things I never thought I’d do. Now, here I am, about to become a published children’s book author! What inspired my book? Let me take you back to when my son Danny was in kindergarten, over 20 years ago… COVER ART BY ROBERT LIU-TRUJILLO, 2016 Danny with a picture of the princess he wants to be in the school parade. Danny is five and he’s already starting to...

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What I Wish I’d Known About Gender When I Became a Parent

Posted on Mar 9, 2016 in Gender and Sexual Orientation, Lessons from the Field | 0 comments

Published in Huffington Post here. “You had a beautiful baby boy.” Those were the first words I heard after my child was born. I named him Daniel and started dressing him in clothes made for boys. But, raising a child is often full of the unexpected. It soon became obvious that Danny was different than other boys. He loved Barbie dolls, dressing up in skirts and shimmery things, and preferred playing with girls. I didn’t know...

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Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion Work: Eight Questions for Building Readiness and Steering Clear of Pitfalls

Posted on Dec 29, 2015 in Diversity, Equity and Inclusion, Lessons from the Field | 0 comments

Diversity, equity, and inclusion work can transform organizations and help them do their work more effectively. This work can be most successful when people are fully invested and have a good idea what is involved. Without this, organizations sometimes set themselves up for failure and bring consultants in with unrealistic expectations. If you are thinking of launching into work around diversity, equity, and inclusion, this post may help you...

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My Son was a Princess for Halloween and I Became a Better Parent

Posted on Oct 1, 2015 in Gender and Sexual Orientation, Lessons from the Field | 0 comments

(published in Huffington Post on September 30, 2015. Also published in Polish, here. See related story on Good Morning America, here.) A few weeks before my son Danny’s 4th birthday, I asked him what he wanted to be for Halloween. “I wanna be a princess,” he said. He didn’t hesitate for a second. But I did. I cringed inside and tried hard not to show it. “My reaction was clouded by visions of children teasing, of...

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Undoing Patterns of Privilege as We Learn

Posted on Sep 22, 2015 in Authentic Communication, Diversity, Equity and Inclusion, Lessons from the Field | 0 comments

In my work with organizations around race, power and privilege, I’ve noticed a pattern. Sometimes we anticipate defensiveness on the part of white people in the group and plan our sessions to accommodate this defensiveness. I’ve begun correcting this pattern and setting goals more proactively. At the same time, I have become hyper aware that a primary reasons we’re doing this work is that people of color may feel unsafe,...

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Transgender Women’s Lives: A Family Matter

Posted on Sep 4, 2015 in Gender and Sexual Orientation, Lessons from the Field | 0 comments

Also published in the Huffington Post, here. This year we’ve broken a record, and it’s not a good one. More transgender women have been killed in the U.S. than in any other year on record. I’m heartbroken and angered that women keep dying, most of them women of color, most of them Black. Most were between the ages of 17-25, just coming into adulthood, when their lives, dreams and futures were stolen. They were sisters,...

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